I am a 28-year-old Canada-based Cameroonian lady. I moved here with my parents and sister 11 years ago immediately after I graduated from GBHS Bamenda. In secondary school, I wasn't really what any one would describe as pretty or beautiful. I never had fully developed boobs or butt but after I spent a year in Canada they all popped out. My mother jokes about it all the time, she says the Canadian food is going only to my butt and boobs.
Things got serious pretty quickly and when my mother went to Cameroon last year in December, Nestor picked her up from the airport and drove her to all the business meetings she had in Yaounde. It was also during this period that my sister who reads Kinnaka's blog religiously, showed me the story I mentioned at the beginning. I read the story but quickly dismissed it as one of those things. My mother said nothing but good things too about Nestor so my heart was set on him, but my sister on the other hand was very suspicious of him.
A few weeks ago, my friend in Belgium "whatsapped" me the same story about the man who got used. She told me that she saw it circulating on Facebook recently and wanted me to read it. I told I read it already and told her myself and Nestor loved each other and he wasn't using or trying to use me. Part of me however was worried because this was the second time I was shown the story. I started wondering if they were seeing something that I was too wrapped up in love to see.
Part of me started noticing things which I considered as silly at that time. Nestor was spending so much time with his babymama and their daughter. Each time we spoke I felt like there was someone there listening and at one point I heard someone giggle, but when I asked him he said it was from the TV and we moved on. I started surprising him with phone calls out of our normal routine. Most of these times he didn't pick or he would and drop. I realized that everything I knew about him was only what he told me as I didn't really talk to his family and friends much.
I went in search of my former best friend who was Nestor's neighbour and luckily found her on Facebook. We exchanged contacts and I called her later that night to talk about Nestor. Before I even had a chance to say anything, she told me my former crush was marrying in a weeks time and would soon travel to Canada. I was like which crush, and she told me Nestor was marrying his girlfriend with whom they had a baby together. According to her, the girl insisted they should get married before Nestor left for Canada. I asked her again: "Which Nestor?". She laughed and said: "So Canada don make you forget your crush Nestor ehhh, anyhow you be forget me too." I was in shock! My Nestor was getting married to his babymama? The same babymama he told me was not wife material! I told her it wasn't true as I was calling her to tell her about myself and Nestor and how he would soon move to Canada for us to get married. She laughed and asked me to stop joking and told me Nestor's babymama is from her tribe Santa and her mother has been invited for the traditional wedding.
After convincing her I was serious, she decided to make some calls around Cameroon. She came back and told me that Nestor never stopped dating his babymama as he told me. She told me Nestor and the babymama wanted to use me. The plan was for Nestor to marry her traditionally, come to Canada marry me, get a stay, in Canada then leave me and bring her and his daughter from Cameroon. I called Nestor immediately and confronted him and he told me it was a lie. I wanted until the day of the wedding and he didn't post any photos on Facebook. I searched for his babymama's Facebook profile and noticed that she didn't post photos, but her friends started tagging her on photos of her and Nestor's traditional wedding.
I confronted Nestor with the photos and he blocked me from everywhere and changed his number. He didn't even have the decency to say he was sorry. My heart is shattered and might never heal but I am happy that it found out about his plan to scam me early enough.
Thank you Kinnaka for the story your reader shared. I hope someone out there can learn from my own story. Don't be blinded by love, there are always red flags. Don't ignore them.